From Solomon to Shannon: Why WIse Men Still Self-DestrucT

"Shannon Sharpe media controversy reflecting cultural pressure on Black men"

The Headlines Reveal the Hidden Patterns

Another day, another headline: a public figure facing serious allegations, this time Shannon Sharpe. A 50-something former NFL star turned media mogul, accused of misconduct involving a young woman nearly three decades his junior. The comments came swiftly, flooding timelines and group chats. Some defended him. Some condemned him. But most, regardless of opinion, seemed to ask the same haunting question:

“How does a man with so much to lose keep ending up in situations like this?”

It’s the same question people quietly asked about P. Diddy as shocking footage and federal raids stirred memories of past excesses. And it’s the same question, posed more poetically, that the Bible asks of King Solomon: “Why would the wisest man in the world chase the very thing that led to his undoing?”

This article isn’t about pointing fingers at celebrities. It’s about pulling back the curtain on a deeper struggle. One that isn’t confined to fame, money, or status. It’s about understanding what drives men, especially Black men, into cycles of indulgence, secrecy, and ultimately exposure.

This is about sexual appetites, cultural shame, and the wisdom required to master what could otherwise master us. It’s about what happens when a man, no matter how powerful, lets unchecked desire guide his decisions.

Because in the end, this isn’t just about Shannon Sharpe or Solomon.

It’s about us.

The Anatomy of Appetites

There’s a biological phenomenon called the Coolidge Effect. It’s named after a joke involving President Calvin Coolidge and a rooster, but its implications are dead serious. Scientists discovered that male mammals, including humans, show renewed sexual interest when presented with new partners, even after being exhausted by repeated encounters with the same one.

Translation: the male brain is wired for novelty, not just satisfaction. Newness triggers dopamine. And in a culture where everything from porn algorithms to OnlyFans pages profit off this reality, our most ancient instincts are being hijacked by our most advanced technology.

But here’s the twist: what starts as curiosity often becomes consumption.

And consumption without constraint leads to chaos.

King Solomon knew something about that. He wasn’t just the wisest man in history; he was also one of the wealthiest and most sexually indulgent. According to the record, he had 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3), which is not a typo. That’s a man who had full access to everything, yet still wanted more.

The irony? Solomon, the man who warned others in Proverbs about the “seductress whose house leads to death” (Proverbs 7), found himself in the exact trap he described.

Appetites, by nature, expand.

What satisfied yesterday won’t satisfy today.

And if left unchecked, desire becomes an unrelenting god.

In the streets, we might call it “being a player.” In the suburbs, it might be seen as a “midlife crisis.” In the church, it’s often tucked away under layers of silence and shame. But at the root, it’s the same story: men chasing something they can’t explain, trying to fill a void they don’t understand, and destroying their witness, families, and legacies in the process.

This ain’t about being horny.

This is about being hungry.

And the problem isn’t that men have appetites. It’s that too many never learn to train them.

We’re not animals.

We’re image-bearers.

But without wisdom, the line between the two gets blurry real fast.

Shame, Exposure, and the Cultural Cage

For Black men in America, sexuality is never neutral.

From the slave block to TikTok, our bodies have been studied, labeled, feared, fetishized, and commodified. We were bred for strength, punished for attraction, and praised for performance, but rarely given the space to be whole.

We’re either too much…or not enough.

Hypersexual threats or absent fathers.

Exotic fantasies or walking scandals.

But rarely human.

This cultural distortion creates a cage with invisible bars that still confines us today. When that cage is internalized, it births an emotional split: we perform manhood for the world while hiding the brokenness inside.

That’s why the downfall of high-profile men like Puff or Shannon Sharpe doesn’t just feel like celebrity gossip; it hits on a collective wound. Their exposure becomes our cautionary tale. Whether the allegations hold or not, the conversation reveals the same undercurrent: 

How are we still here?

We’ve built empires and earned degrees. We’ve changed laws and created culture. But we still haven’t figured out how to talk honestly about desire and discipline. So instead, we hide. We cope. We hustle harder. And when the shame finally breaks through, it often comes as a headline.

But Scripture is honest about this dynamic. Jesus said it plainly: “There is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed” (Luke 8:17), not as a threat, but as a truth.

Shame thrives in the dark. Exposure is inevitable. Not because the world is cruel, but because God is just. He loves us too much to let us keep performing while self-destructing.

Here’s the sobering reality:

Unchecked appetites don’t just burn bridges; they become altars.

And if we’re not careful, we’ll end up sacrificing our integrity, our peace, and our calling for a moment of satisfaction we didn’t even need.

So, where do we go from here?

That’s where wisdom comes in.

Wisdom vs. Foolishness: What Solomon Forgot

Solomon didn’t fall because he lacked information. 

He fell because he lacked discipline. He had all the game. All the access. All the warnings. As a matter of fact, he wrote the warnings. But knowledge without application is what the Bible calls foolishness. And foolishness isn’t about IQ. It’s about what you do with what you know.

That’s where many of us find ourselves today, not stupid, not evil, just undisciplined.

We keep saying “I know better,” but the real question is: do we want better? Because if we don’t deal with our appetites now, they will deal with us later. And when they do, they won’t ask for permission. They’ll come for our names, our families, our influence…everything.

That’s why Solomon’s story is more than a Bible lesson, it is a mirror.

His downfall wasn’t sudden. It was slow. Subtle. Accumulative.

Indulgence after indulgence. Compromise after compromise.

Until the man who once asked God for wisdom started bowing to idols.

Here’s what Solomon forgot:

Wisdom isn’t just knowing what’s right. It’s building your life in a way that honors what’s right.

So, how do we do that?

Here are five principles I give the men in my circle, because this isn’t just about surviving shame,  it’s about building a legacy.

1. Recognize the Cycle

If your habits follow a predictable pattern of temptation, indulgence, regret, and repeat, they are not random. That’s bondage.

Track it. Name it. Break it.

2. Build Sacred Boundaries

Foolish men rely on willpower. Wise men build walls.

That might mean deleting apps, cutting off casual connections, or changing the way you move.

Boundaries don’t make you weak. They prove you care about staying strong.

3. Surround Yourself with Brothers, Not Just Fans

If everyone around you claps but nobody checks you, you’re not safe. You’re set up for failure.

Get some real ones in your life. People who love you enough to challenge your impulses.

Solomon didn’t have that. You still can.

4. Choose Legacy Over Lust

Every appetite has a cost. Ask yourself: “Is this moment worth my peace, my platform, my family, my future?” Because temporary pleasure always over-promises and under-delivers.

5. Submit Your Strength to God

The truth is, we can’t out-muscle temptation.

But we can “out-wisdom” it.

That means submitting our bodies, minds, and patterns to the One who made us. Because true power isn’t indulging every desire—it’s having the strength to walk away. We don’t need more talented men. We don’t need more followers.

We need wiser kings. The kind who don’t fall when no one’s watching.

Kings Fall When Appetites Reign

You don’t have to be a king to fall like one. Just let your appetites drive. Let shame silence your need for help. Let power go unchecked and pleasure go unexamined. And eventually, what’s hidden will be a headline. That’s not a threat. It’s a pattern.

And the only way to break it…is to walk in wisdom.

Wisdom doesn’t mean you’ve never messed up. It means you’ve learned where that road leads and chose a different one. It means you’ve seen what indulgence costs and decided you’re done paying that price. It means you’re not perfect, but you’re intentional.

Because every man, especially Black men, navigating a culture that profits off our downfall, needs to know: You are not just a body, a brand, or a headline waiting to happen.

You are a temple.

You are a legacy.

You are a leader.

And you are accountable.

So here’s the challenge: Starve what’s killing you. Feed what’s building you.

Turn your shame into testimony. Turn your secrets into sacred wisdom. And guard your name like your life depends on it, because it does. You don’t need to be Solomon to know this truth.

You just need to be a man who’s ready to live free.

My Prayer For You

May you have the courage to confront your cravings,

the wisdom to set new patterns,

and the grace to rise from whatever tried to bury you.

You are more than your appetite.

You are chosen to lead with clarity, not compulsion.

So walk like a king, crowned by wisdom, not consumed by weakness.